A Mother Teaches Love
Think about how you see your day. You have alot of things you need to do -
lists, goals, priorities. As you accomplish these you feel good. This is the way we have been taught to work and achieve.
Think about how your baby sees the day. She wakes up, "Where is mum! Let's play!"
Consider the life of a child whose mother uses her considerable gifts and personality to enrich the life of her child. She dreams up a beautiful childhood. She makes sure it includes education, fun, safety but most of all, lashings of love. She delights in spending time with her child.
Think of the difference in the feelings the child receives from those around her.
As we serve our child, our love for him grows. As our love for him grows, our joy in serving him grows -it is a very nice cycle.
Can you increase those times when you have fun together, when you are enjoying his responses?
Can you decrease those times when you are frustrated and bored with your job. There will be some of this of course, but if you can focus on the child's happiness, and on your vision of what you are striving to achieve, you will find you, yourself love the mother job more. Your idea of a good day will not depend so much on what you have "GOT DONE", but on another memory in the happy childhood you are creating.
Sometimes we think our child needs swimming lessons and music lessons, cubs and sports and tutoring and therapy.
What they need is you.
There is a place for some of these things later, but now, in the early years, YOU take them to the pool to splash and kick, YOU make a band out of sauce pan lids, YOU take them on a bushwalk, YOU play catch with them, YOU play counting games and cooking. You take all their little problems and fix them.
I think that the scripture "the love of many shall wax cold" (Matthew 24:12) can happen as mothers distance themselves from their children and teach love less well. I especially love to see young mothers who provide a beautiful childhood for their children, when they themselves did not have one. They learn love and teach it at the same time.
The most important part of their childhood will be the feelings they have.
Children have very intense feelings of all kinds- fear, anger, sadness, joy, delight, love.
They come with personalities and character traits. One of your most important jobs as mother is to teach them how to deal with their feelings.
Fear- you are safe with me- I'm here.
Anger- It will go away. I'm on your team.
Sadness- I'll help you. I love you.
Joy- he shares it with you- do you respond or dampen?
Delight- you laugh together
Love- her problems are softened, her happiness pure, because of your love.
One of my favourite fridge signs:
"Make her first relationship with you a truly beautiful one." Linda Eyre
If the breakfast dishes are still on the table and the phone calls unmade, call it proof that you are doing a good job.
As you sit it in the morning sunshine with a baby on your lap and a toddler at your side cuddling and talking, you are doing your BEST work. The must-dos will get done.
Give yourself full credit for the time you spend creating a childhood. It won't show, but it is there.